Friday, June 18, 2010

Not-So-Fresh New Releases #2

My original intention for this blog was not for it to become a screed against the banalities of contemporary cinema. However, as an avid movie-goer I can't help but be irritated as yet another terrible movie (or two or three) gets released each weekend. I'm not the only one, though. Every recent article I've read about the current crop of new releases decries this summer as unusually lackluster. This weekend's release of Toy Story 3 may be a bright spot in the season, as indicated by positive advance reviews and Pixar's track record for excellent films. However, it is still Toy Story 3 and frankly, as much I as like Woody and Buzz, I'm more interested in seeing a new story with a new cast of characters.
With all the sequels, remakes, or near-remakes in theaters right now I'm tempted to just say, "watch the original," and be done with it. Take the new version of The Karate Kid. It has received some positive reviews, but they generally end with the caveat, "the original is better." My personal reason for skipping this movie is that it stars the annoying Jaden Smith, who single-handedly ruined the 2008 remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still (yes, it was all his fault). So, save a few dollars and rent the 1984 original starring Ralph Macchio. Case closed, right? Well, I'm feeling a little more ambitious than that, so here are some more suggestions for what to watch instead of what's in theaters right now.

The Karate Kid - 70% freshness rating on Rotten Tomatoes
In addition to demonstrating some cool karate moves, The Karate Kid beautifully illustrates a friendship between a young person and an old person. Some other films which I would rate alongside Karate Kid in this category (though "old" is a relative term in some cases) are Captains Courageous (1937), About a Boy (2002), and Up (2009).

The A-Team - 50% freshness rating
In the interest of full disclosure, I must say that I saw The A-Team and I enjoyed it. That said, I will also concede that this film could be adequately summarized by a montage of explosions and gunfire intercut with scenes of the team throatily laughing at their own audacity. The A-Team employs one of my favorite film cliches - the rag-tag group on a mission. And the A-Team is indeed a rag-tag group: Hannibal is old, Murdock is crazy, B.A. is a born-again pacifist, and Face is actually Jim Carrey from The Mask. But if you prefer a film with coherent action sequences and a realistic relationship to physics, may I suggest one of these classic "gang of misfits" films: The Great Escape (1963) - Allied POWs, each with his own particular set of skills, must work together to escape a Nazi prison camp; The Dirty Dozen (1967) - military men again, this time they must work together to complete a daring mission; The Magnificent Seven (1960) - a diverse group of gunslingers bands together to protect a town from Mexican bandits.

Shrek Forever After - 54% freshness rating
The Shrek series, now on movie number four, began as a twist on the story of "beauty and the beast," except this time the beauty is secretly a beast, too. So, you could watch Disney's excellent Beauty and the Beast (1991), which manages to be heartwarming and funny without relying on pop culture references, the crutch of the Shrek series. Or, for an even more sophisticated alternative, you could rent Jean Cocteau's fantastic French version of the tale (1946). One Shrek character I do like is Puss in Boots, voiced by Antonio Banderas. The Spanish accent combined with fancy swordsmanship and, of course, the boots, recalls none other than Mandy Pantinkin's Inigo Montoya from The Princess Bride (1987). Princess Bride also has a "fractured fairytale" style somewhat similar to that of the Shrek movies. Just think of Andre the Giant as a much friendlier and more pleasant Shrek!

Killers - 13% freshness rating
In this action-comedy an unsuspecting wife (Katherine Heigl) discovers her husband (Ashton Kutcher) is actually a secret agent - and hijinks ensue! Many people have already pointed out the obvious similarities to True Lies (1994) starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jamie Lee Curtis. However, I'm going to suggest two films directed by Alfred Hitchcock, which fall into the suspense genre rather than action, but also contain husbands with secrets. In Suspicion (1941), a shy, plain woman (played by the beautiful Joan Fontaine) begins to suspect that her new husband (Cary Grant) is a killer, and that she may be his intended victim. In Rebecca (1940), a mousy, unassuming young bride (also played by the stunning Fontaine) moves into her husband's grand estate and begins to discover unsettling secrets about him and his first wife's death.

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