Roger and Me

I met Roger Ebert once at a book signing in New York City in 2005. After telling some very interesting stories and answering questions from the crowd, he signed my copy of his book, Great Movies II, and my DVD of Citizen Kane, for which he recorded a commentary track. I told him that I cited his commentary in a paper I had to write about Citizen Kane. I told him that I’ve been watching At the Movies since I was 9 and I’ve seen a number of movies based just on his (and Richard Roeper’s) reviews. He told me, “I hope we don’t lead you astray.” I also told him that I was a film student and I hoped to one day make a movie that gets "Two Thumbs Up". He said, “I hope so too.”

I won’t go so far as to say that I felt like I knew Roger Ebert, but I did think of him as a mentor. I felt like if I ever met him again we would fall easily into a conversation about movies and in talking about movies we would be talking about ourselves too. I always felt like that would happen. The drive home from work was extra-long last Thursday after I heard that Ebert had passed away. I thought about why I had that feeling. Roger Ebert’s movie reviews were not just reviews. They were first person personal essays, the key word being “personal.” He was telling you about his experience with a movie, how it made him feel, and what it made him think about. Whether he was on television or in print he did not speak with authority but with knowledge and enthusiasm, and his enthusiasm was such that his words could become poetic. His tone was always casual, never didactic. He was able to capture some of the magic that is the movies.

I watched At the Movies, in all its forms, every chance I had. It was difficult since the local television stations would move the show all over their schedule. In college, when I often slept till noon or later on weekends, I made myself wake up  early on Sunday mornings to watch Ebert and Roeper talk about the week’s releases. I sat on the couch in my pajamas eating cereal and watching that show just like I did when I was 9. The internet made things easier. I could watch At the Movies online in case I missed it on TV, and I could read Ebert’s print reviews on his website. The backlog of his reviews, going back to 1967, was a treasure trove for me. I really enjoyed reading his reviews of notable movies from years past. I even enjoyed reading the bad reviews for movies that I liked; it was still great prose. When I had to write papers for my film classes, I tried to write like Ebert. When I started to write movie reviews, I tried to write like Ebert, without fear and always with honesty.

I learned so much from reading those reviews, watching him on TV, and reading his blog. I learned how to talk about movies and how to write about movies. I learned that the real job of a film critic is not to stand on a box and declare what is good and bad, but to recommend whether or not a movie is worth someone’s time and money. I learned that movies are made to entertain but they can also touch your heart and move your soul. Movies can be art. I learned that it’s okay to have an opinion, no matter who else agrees or disagrees. If you like a movie that no one else liked, or hated the most popular movie of the year, it’s okay. I learned that "best of" lists shouldn’t be taken too seriously but can still be fun. I learned that over time your opinion about a movie can change, and that’s okay too.

I know for sure that I’ll always be a little sad that my childhood hero is gone. I know for sure that Roger Ebert influenced countless film critics, journalists, filmmakers, and moviegoers. I know for sure that the two best parts of going to the movies are when the lights dim and the screen begins to move, and the conversation afterwards. I know for sure that I’ll still read his reviews online and in books. I know for sure that I’ll still try to write like him when I write about movies. I know for sure that when everyone else disagrees with me about a movie, I’ll think of Ebert and not tailor my opinion to anyone but myself. I know for sure that I’ll be going to movies or watching them at home for the rest of my life. And I know for sure that I have four people to thank for my love of movies and the major role they play in my life: my parents and Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert.

Thank you, Gene.

Thank you, Roger.